Did I ever tell you I was scared?? Well, now you know. I'm so scared. I want this more than words could ever describe but I also know that sometimes God has different plans for us. My heart believes that those girls should be with us. Every part of me desires to be their mom, but then that little voice in my head keeps reminding me that it might not happen.
I've never met them nor seen what they look like but it doesn't take me long to imagine them. For so long, it seemed as though our plans were for 1 little girl. That was it and then SUPRISE the idea of possibly 2! We never even flinched, we all were in agreement that we could do 2! Somehow, it's not hard to think that God realizes how much love we have waiting for this little one that he might just bless us with 2 little girls! (Atleast that is what my heart feels and believes.
So I cry and I wait and I cry some more. It's hard to surrender and relinquish all control but somehow I find myself just lying in His arms. That's quite comforting, ecspecially when you don't know if the amount of children you have may double! :) So I cry a little bit and then I wipe away the tears and come to the realization that my God has it all figured out. So I can't deny that I'm scared, I bet Sarah was scared when she found out and I bet she really didn't even believe it could be true at first but you know what it happened. I wonder if she stayed up till early morning just wondering...thinking...believeing....
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Tuesday, August 12, 2008
We love because He first loved us. 1 John 4:19
Isn't it amazing just to totally rely upon the love of the Lord? To completely grasp His amazing love. It's taken 35 years plus for me to get it and some days I want to argue with Him...How can you love me that much? How could you give up your only Son? I am not worthy! But then I look at all the blessings around me and know that they come from Him. Unbelievable. We all have it! Have you realized how great His love is for you today? If you haven't take a look at your children or grandchildren's eyes, look at the food in your fridge, the clothes on your back, your health, all of it because He loves us. Not because of what we have done or what we do for Him but JUST BECAUSE! It doesn't get any better than that!
Surely GOODNESS AND MERCY WILL FOLLOW me ALL the days of my life and I will DWELL IN THE LORD'S HOUSE FOREVER!! Psalms 23. How cool is that! Goodness and mercy FOLLOWS us! And, we can dwell in the Lord's house FOREVER!! That means right here, right now we've got it! Don't let today pass without checking out His gooddness and mercy and sit down in that easy chair for a minute and grasp where you are and whose you are! God is good.
Surely GOODNESS AND MERCY WILL FOLLOW me ALL the days of my life and I will DWELL IN THE LORD'S HOUSE FOREVER!! Psalms 23. How cool is that! Goodness and mercy FOLLOWS us! And, we can dwell in the Lord's house FOREVER!! That means right here, right now we've got it! Don't let today pass without checking out His gooddness and mercy and sit down in that easy chair for a minute and grasp where you are and whose you are! God is good.
Thursday, August 7, 2008
Waiting on the Lord
No news, really....just that we must wait. We must wait and see if the birth parents are willing to give up their girls before actual rights are terminated. We don't have the Pride classes taken that we would need if they do wait till the termination hearing and then the girls will be placed with the state for adoption. We really don't believe God wants us rushing around trying to MAKE it happen! If we did that it would be of us and not of God. I'm so glad we realize that now. It's hard though, not to want to just start doing everything we can to get them...then what?? We still have the possibility that it might not happen. Why go and make ourselves miserable to make something happen? Been there, done that before! Haven't we all??!! Isn't it great we really can rest in His care. That we have the blessed assurance that Jesus is right with us, that His glory will be revealed if we choose Him....
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalms something...Not the best on the book and verse...my friend says just say, "It is written!" Anyway...God knows the desires of our heart. So we just know that we know that we know....that His plan is ultimately much more than we could ever dream!! We've let it be known, we've spoke it, we stood in agreement, so now we wait....We will wait upon the Lord, we will renew our strength, we will mount on wings like eagles, we will run and not be weary and walk and not faint!
So Tuesday I get the daily devotional email from Joel Osteen. If you've never listened to him or read any of his books. You should! Got lots of his books, so if you'd like to borrow, let me know! Anyway, this devotional was Isaiah 48:3
I foretold the former things long ago, my mouth announced them and I made them known; then suddenly I acted, and they came to pass.
We had the desire, we came in agreement, we told folks, we stepped out in faith, it took us a while but we began the process.....THEN THERE'S GOD!
We just pray that the girl's family embrace our Savior Jesus Christ, that they open their heart to His love and through that love He will guide them. No matter what the plan may be, ultimately we pray for the salvation, the true adoption from the Lord to this family! That the fullnesss of his grace and mercy chase them down and overtake them. It's with shouts of praise and adoration for Jesus Christ we pray Amen!!!
Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart. Psalms something...Not the best on the book and verse...my friend says just say, "It is written!" Anyway...God knows the desires of our heart. So we just know that we know that we know....that His plan is ultimately much more than we could ever dream!! We've let it be known, we've spoke it, we stood in agreement, so now we wait....We will wait upon the Lord, we will renew our strength, we will mount on wings like eagles, we will run and not be weary and walk and not faint!
So Tuesday I get the daily devotional email from Joel Osteen. If you've never listened to him or read any of his books. You should! Got lots of his books, so if you'd like to borrow, let me know! Anyway, this devotional was Isaiah 48:3
I foretold the former things long ago, my mouth announced them and I made them known; then suddenly I acted, and they came to pass.
We had the desire, we came in agreement, we told folks, we stepped out in faith, it took us a while but we began the process.....THEN THERE'S GOD!
We just pray that the girl's family embrace our Savior Jesus Christ, that they open their heart to His love and through that love He will guide them. No matter what the plan may be, ultimately we pray for the salvation, the true adoption from the Lord to this family! That the fullnesss of his grace and mercy chase them down and overtake them. It's with shouts of praise and adoration for Jesus Christ we pray Amen!!!
Wednesday, August 6, 2008
Trust
Trust- to place confidence. Abraham, Noah, Sarah, Rahab....just a few folks that decided to place confidence in God! We are asking for the same trust that they possesed! Can you imagine the faith it took to trust in God back then? Something that the physical eyes could not see but God had already placed what was necessary to complete His plan in each of these people, they had to make the choice to step out in faith. And, now we have the Word that shares with us each of their stories. Think about them, they didn't have the Bible to go to. What men and women of faith they were. I'm so thankful for the Word and blessed to know that God is so good!
As for God His way is PERFECT, the word of the Lord is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust Him. Ps. 18:30
But I trusted in thee oh God, Oh Lord; I said Thou art my God. Ps.31:14
Blessed is the man who trust in the Lord who puts his confidence in Him. Jer. 17:7
We come to you God trusting that Your plan will come to pass. We come boldly to your throne and say we trust in You alone!
As for God His way is PERFECT, the word of the Lord is tried: he is a buckler to all those that trust Him. Ps. 18:30
But I trusted in thee oh God, Oh Lord; I said Thou art my God. Ps.31:14
Blessed is the man who trust in the Lord who puts his confidence in Him. Jer. 17:7
We come to you God trusting that Your plan will come to pass. We come boldly to your throne and say we trust in You alone!
Sunday, August 3, 2008
Pray
Can't share much....because we don't know much.....we have a lead on a possible adoption. 2 little girls. I'm not going to go into much detail because I don't know a whole lot. Of course, you can imagine our thoughts are running wild! But there is a sense of calmness of peace, the great thing is we don't have to figure it out. God is already working it out. That's pretty cool. Boy, His plans are so much more than we could have ever dreamed of, but you know what that only makes us realize more and more that HE ALONE IS GOD.
Our request is for those of you that read this join us in our prayer that God's will be done. The day Clinton and I came in agreement about adopting, God's plan began to spin in motion.
Our prayer is,
"Dear Lord, we come to you with complete surrender. Only you know the desires of our heart and we pray that whatever your will is that it be done. We know that you realize we are ready and waiting so we ask that you have favor on the timing and make it happen as quick as it can. We pray that you keep our daughter or daughters safe right now. We ask that you give complete peace to those that love them during this time of decision. That they will sense the amazing love that these girls will be getting the rest of their lives by choosing the gift of adoption. You alone can fulfill our needs Lord and we pray that you keep our minds still as we wait. You are mighty and your are amazing. We've turned it all over to you and we thank you for what you have done for our family and for what you are going to do! All praises go to you, Our Father. We pray this prayer in the name of Jesus,Amen, and Amen!"
I'll share with you a prayer from a friend, please join us as we lift our prayers up to our Father.
“Lord, for Clinton and Paige Evans and family, I claim your peace and protection, your understanding and grace. I claim for them, that you deliver your blessings unto them and their daughter or daughters unto them. I pray that the people you choose to use as tools open their hearts and put their faith in you in order that your will be done, father. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
We look to Him for complete guidance and understanding. God is good.
Our request is for those of you that read this join us in our prayer that God's will be done. The day Clinton and I came in agreement about adopting, God's plan began to spin in motion.
Our prayer is,
"Dear Lord, we come to you with complete surrender. Only you know the desires of our heart and we pray that whatever your will is that it be done. We know that you realize we are ready and waiting so we ask that you have favor on the timing and make it happen as quick as it can. We pray that you keep our daughter or daughters safe right now. We ask that you give complete peace to those that love them during this time of decision. That they will sense the amazing love that these girls will be getting the rest of their lives by choosing the gift of adoption. You alone can fulfill our needs Lord and we pray that you keep our minds still as we wait. You are mighty and your are amazing. We've turned it all over to you and we thank you for what you have done for our family and for what you are going to do! All praises go to you, Our Father. We pray this prayer in the name of Jesus,Amen, and Amen!"
I'll share with you a prayer from a friend, please join us as we lift our prayers up to our Father.
“Lord, for Clinton and Paige Evans and family, I claim your peace and protection, your understanding and grace. I claim for them, that you deliver your blessings unto them and their daughter or daughters unto them. I pray that the people you choose to use as tools open their hearts and put their faith in you in order that your will be done, father. In Jesus’ name, Amen.”
We look to Him for complete guidance and understanding. God is good.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Beauty for Ashes
One of my favorite passages is Isaiah 61. In that passage it speaks of God's love for us and the amazing favor we can receive if we just proclaim "our priesthood". For many years I was bound by what this world calls normalcy" if you don't have some form of impatience, some form of trouble that brings you down, some lack of joy because you aren't happy enough....the world thinks you are crazy.
Folks speak "negative" words daily, "That's to be expected, things like this happen to me all the time", or "My mom had cancer, so now I wouldn't doubt that I'm going to get it", " or "Yep, we're just barely getting by"....all that negative talk. Until about a year or so ago, the importance of positive words has never become quite so clear as it did when I begin to welcome the presence of the Holy Spirit.
There's absolutely no way a person can have the complete fullness of what Jesus Christ has to offer unless they get these negative thoughts and words out of their lives. I really never considered myself a negative person per say, but I know that negative thoughts clouded my mind probably every day. That's Satan's hold on us. He knows that we all strive to have the "perfect" life. Gosh, that goes all the way back to Adam and Eve. They had it made and then boom they wanted more, Eve couldn't stand the thought that there was possibly something "more". God knew that after that day the only way we could ever completely understand the true "fullness" that He alone can offer was to give His Son Jesus Christ.
Everyday I encourage you to ask Jesus into your heart. Don't just take it for granted each day you wake up that you are prepared for this world just because you are a Christian. We are to be renewed every day with the Holy Spirit. Don't get stuck in a rut, don't just accept what has been.....strive for that which is new and glorious. God's unfailing love! With faith, ask God to show you more. More of His fullness, not more "stuff" because all that "stuff" will never fill the void that only He can.
As I read the passage, giving beauty for ashes ....it just keeps resenating with me. When you think about ashes- think about the big pile of stuff that accumulates in your live fear, judgment, resentment, pride all that stuff that weighs us down. Pile that stuff up and let it burn! The symbolism of the ashes is amazing. He knew we would have to let it get to be ashes before we would let it go. It's like that piece of wood, you can't see it once it's been set on fire and burnt to ashes. Let all that "stuff" burn till all they are the ashes that remain. Don't leave any of it sitting around. Set it afire with the love that God alone provides. Then take a look at those ashes and know that God wants to turn them into something beautiful.
God wants more for us than we can ever imagine. Our plans look pitiful compared to what He wants to do in our lives. Ask for His fullness. Become a strong "Priest of the Lord". It's not about what we've done wrong in our lives it's about what we can do right with Jesus Christ!
Folks speak "negative" words daily, "That's to be expected, things like this happen to me all the time", or "My mom had cancer, so now I wouldn't doubt that I'm going to get it", " or "Yep, we're just barely getting by"....all that negative talk. Until about a year or so ago, the importance of positive words has never become quite so clear as it did when I begin to welcome the presence of the Holy Spirit.
There's absolutely no way a person can have the complete fullness of what Jesus Christ has to offer unless they get these negative thoughts and words out of their lives. I really never considered myself a negative person per say, but I know that negative thoughts clouded my mind probably every day. That's Satan's hold on us. He knows that we all strive to have the "perfect" life. Gosh, that goes all the way back to Adam and Eve. They had it made and then boom they wanted more, Eve couldn't stand the thought that there was possibly something "more". God knew that after that day the only way we could ever completely understand the true "fullness" that He alone can offer was to give His Son Jesus Christ.
Everyday I encourage you to ask Jesus into your heart. Don't just take it for granted each day you wake up that you are prepared for this world just because you are a Christian. We are to be renewed every day with the Holy Spirit. Don't get stuck in a rut, don't just accept what has been.....strive for that which is new and glorious. God's unfailing love! With faith, ask God to show you more. More of His fullness, not more "stuff" because all that "stuff" will never fill the void that only He can.
As I read the passage, giving beauty for ashes ....it just keeps resenating with me. When you think about ashes- think about the big pile of stuff that accumulates in your live fear, judgment, resentment, pride all that stuff that weighs us down. Pile that stuff up and let it burn! The symbolism of the ashes is amazing. He knew we would have to let it get to be ashes before we would let it go. It's like that piece of wood, you can't see it once it's been set on fire and burnt to ashes. Let all that "stuff" burn till all they are the ashes that remain. Don't leave any of it sitting around. Set it afire with the love that God alone provides. Then take a look at those ashes and know that God wants to turn them into something beautiful.
God wants more for us than we can ever imagine. Our plans look pitiful compared to what He wants to do in our lives. Ask for His fullness. Become a strong "Priest of the Lord". It's not about what we've done wrong in our lives it's about what we can do right with Jesus Christ!
Sunday, July 27, 2008
We are almost done!!!
With the papework that is! We worked on Clinton's autobiographical statement today and I think we are almost done. I believe by Tuesday we can mail it all off to the Home Study agency and we will be on our way to the next step.
Now the home study is complete I can send in all the grant applications. There are so many grants out there and boy receiving any of them would be a tremendous blessing. As many know, our only reservation about adopting at all has been a financial question. We know that God will provide. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. But in all ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths. Prov 3. We are dying here...boy wouldn't it be nice to know that the 28,000 was just sitting there waiting to be used but you know what? It's not there where we can see it but I believe it! I believe that God has His own little bank account waiting on us. Praise God!!! That he will work it out so that we can praise Him when we hold our little one in our arms! I cry as I write this because of just how amazing He is!!! God is good!
One thing that has become quite clear to me is that we have to stop eating out!!!! I was taking a look at our eating out for the last month or so and I believe we can free up some $$ if we will stick our hiney's at our kitchen table! Now grant it, that is going to be quite a bit harder to do than the average....since we LOVE to eat out. Don't quite know why..I really do love to cook....it's the cleaning up I hate...the boys better get their dish washing hands ready! Cause this momma means business, we've got to get this little girl home. How can we expect God for anything if we aren't using the money He provides to us wisely. Sorry God, going to have to get better at that!!
I am so very thankful for those that have prayed for us, that have given us that little word of encouragement during this time. Our strength has come from God and we so appreciate your prayers to Him! Isn't it great just to rest in His loving arms to know that He is our Father. To completely grasp the amazing power and authority we have as His children. To feel the amazing love that He gives even when we mess up! God is love! Now go and be love because where there is love, there is God!!!
Now the home study is complete I can send in all the grant applications. There are so many grants out there and boy receiving any of them would be a tremendous blessing. As many know, our only reservation about adopting at all has been a financial question. We know that God will provide. Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. But in all ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths. Prov 3. We are dying here...boy wouldn't it be nice to know that the 28,000 was just sitting there waiting to be used but you know what? It's not there where we can see it but I believe it! I believe that God has His own little bank account waiting on us. Praise God!!! That he will work it out so that we can praise Him when we hold our little one in our arms! I cry as I write this because of just how amazing He is!!! God is good!
One thing that has become quite clear to me is that we have to stop eating out!!!! I was taking a look at our eating out for the last month or so and I believe we can free up some $$ if we will stick our hiney's at our kitchen table! Now grant it, that is going to be quite a bit harder to do than the average....since we LOVE to eat out. Don't quite know why..I really do love to cook....it's the cleaning up I hate...the boys better get their dish washing hands ready! Cause this momma means business, we've got to get this little girl home. How can we expect God for anything if we aren't using the money He provides to us wisely. Sorry God, going to have to get better at that!!
I am so very thankful for those that have prayed for us, that have given us that little word of encouragement during this time. Our strength has come from God and we so appreciate your prayers to Him! Isn't it great just to rest in His loving arms to know that He is our Father. To completely grasp the amazing power and authority we have as His children. To feel the amazing love that He gives even when we mess up! God is love! Now go and be love because where there is love, there is God!!!
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