Let it Rain...for I know who Reigns!

Let it rain, Lord.
Let it pour.
For I know the God that sends the sunshine sends the rain.
The rain doesn't bother me anymore. It used to.
I'd pray for the rain to stop.
I can't take anymore rain, Lord- I'd cry.
I pray for the rain now.
Lord bring on the rain!
With the rain there comes cleansing.
With the rain I grow closer to my God.
Thank you Lord for the rain.
Let it rain....for I know who Reigns!

Final Homestudy visit

Well, I thought this day would never come...OK I really did think it would but boy did it seem cloudy at times. Once diagnosed with all this heart stuff adoption plans seemed to fall by the wayside. But, the dream and hope was still always there.

See I knew I would be healed from this heart condition. I knew that I would be off every bit of medication. Didn't know when, didn't know exactly how but I knew. So many folks would question me...It's amazing how negative folks can be sometimes. Not on purpose, then again some may have been.... I'll choose to think the first. Anyway, I would claim healing every day. God promises me that. Jesus Christ did not die on that cross, He did not suffer, He did not bleed for any of us to live a mediocre life, filled with sickness and disease. Nor does He want us to accept anything but a full abundant life He promised.

So hope....I guess that's what I had. Some say well you just hoped in your mind. Like that hope that maybe just maybe you will get exactly what you asked for at Christmas but you'd be ok with whatever you get...No, this hope is so much more...It's the eternal hope and belief that what God says, He will do. Maybe not on our time frame, maybe not how we wanted but He will do it. So many of us give up before he can finish His work. Would I have maintained this same hope even if I wouldn't have been healed, I would have to say yes, at this time. It's been the longest 8 months of my life...Who really knows....But I do know that little by little, even before I got sick. He had begun to show me in my faith walk, that He wants to be good to us. We want it now though and He's not so much now as He is Perfect. So His timing is always perfect.

I know that what happened to me had a purpose. If only that I could help someone go through their trial and come out with victory. If he has the ability to save us from our sins. That is mercy and grace our suffient. Why would we not accept His complete healing? That we would walk that walk of faith. That we would know without reservation He bore it all. So hope is eternal. Without hope in Him, we have nothing. Cause this world offers us nothing.

Final homestudy you are welcomed. God I trust in your perfect timing. My hope rest in You alone. You are longing to give us the desires of our heart. Let us wait patiently and know that with You all things are possible.

Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. Try it out in the little stuff. Give Him a chance. Wait, believe, trust. Hope.

Is your hairdryer broke?

Getting ready this morning, I was up listening to some bluegrass. It was all going good UNTIL I go to dry my hair and my hairdryer is broke! OH NO! It's blowing out air- COLD AIR- so it's pretty safe to say that it isn't going to be quite enough to get my hair dryed before end of day! You have to understand my hair is not even close to wash and wear. So I start recalling who used the hairdryer last...CLINTON..."Clinton was this hairdryer working yesterday when you used it....cause when I used it yesterday it was working!" "It was blowing out cold air," he states. "Cold air...why didn't you tell me..." I could have picked up a new one yesterday...now I can't get ready...great, just great...", I replied. So I stormed to my closet hung up my clothes and put my jammies back on. "I'll just not go!" Do I sound like a whiney or what??!!



So I walk into the living room ready to pout for the rest of the day...and God starts working on me..."Paige, do you really think it matters how you look or what you are wearing? Why are you letting something so minor disrupt your whole morning..your whole atttitude. You have a choice. What example are you setting your for your children?" Life is full of "broken hairdryers" Is this how you are going to respond to all of them?" Needless to say, it's been exactly how I've responded...most of the time.



See I like things to go my way. It's nice when it all runs smoothly without any glitches. But day after day the Lord is showing me...Things happen! Sometimes "hairdryers break!" It's your choice as to how you respond. Your choice to take something bad and turn it for His good.


So today I choose to deal with my "broke hairdryers" and realize that I have a choice and the devil will do anything to steal our joy. Big, little it doesn't matter.

All I can say is UMM.

I stood in her room tonight. As I shut the blinds, I just say out loud, "It's so much more than a pink bedroom and a sign that says, "Expect a Miracle." Where did that come from??....I think it's just a small reminder that this is all about Him. Man, it's hard to walk out your faith. I can't imagine how Noah felt when God said, "Build an ark." Or how about when God told Abraham and Sarah they were expecting at like 100 years old....Or when he put the desire in David to fight Goliath. I'm sure more than a few folks thought they were NUTS! I wonder if fear set in and they doubted God. I wonder if in there quiet time alone with Him, did they ask, "Is this really going to happen?" What did it take for them to believe and trust Him? Maybe it's about a hope that is so much bigger than ourselves.

I used to think I could do about anything, if I set my mind to it. I worked hard, tried to always go over and beyond and believed most of the time if I didn't know an answer, I could find it. Oh how things have changed. I can't do anything. I don't know anything. So it's pretty safe to say without Him, I am nothing. I really can't remember how it was without needing Him. Though I know I went a long time that way.....I never want to go back to it again. It's scary the decisions and plans I made on my own. Boy, who did I think I was?

So today, I stand in awe of just how amazing He is. He's the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. Even when it seems like there is no end in sight. God holds it all in His hands. Why is it so hard for us to believe in Him for everything? He created the world. You look at a tree. It's beautiful standing there. Strong, big and the amazing transformation of the colors of its leaves are just a few things that stand out. Think about how far the root system goes, think about how the little seedling grew into the mighty tree it is. God did that. He knew it needed a seed, He knew it would need a strong root system to support the massiveness it would become. So if He created it and planned every little detail all the way down to the seed. Don't you think He cares about every detail of our life. Each decision, each desire. He knows it all. Trust in Him. You are His seed. Continue to be watered by His word. Though you may sway like the tree in the storm rest assure you will not fall if you are deeply rooted in Him.

God is good all the time.

Thoughts...

So today I'm driving down the road and I just start tearing up. I think it's fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of my belief in something that I can't see. My faith is strong in Christ Jesus. He's delivered me from so much. He takes care of me and my family. I fail Him terribly at times but I know He is always there waiting on me. I get mad at myself because I let doubt set in and start questioning the whole adoption thing.

I really want to just go get the loan, go and do it and be done. We know we want to adopt, we know we want a little girl, we know we are ready. So, what's the problem? The problem is "me". See so many times I've taken over, I've made it happen or did it like I thought it should be and then "it's a mess...." I spend days sometimes months or years looking back thinking why didn't I pray and let God move. See I want what I want, NOW! Maybe you are the same way...I don't know.

I have to remember to God a day is a year and a year is a day. So I pray I can stay on God's clock. I pray that I look and see that only a moment has passed and any moment His glory will be revealed. I get excited, I get anxious sometimes....because I know that in the end, I'll want to shout from the rooftop...LOOK WHAT GOD DID!!! I get that way sometimes with just my personal deliverance. Sharing with folks about his unfailing Love and how He chose us, it was never about us or what we can do for Him. He's such an Awesome God.

So for now, I won't pay attention to the days that go by until we get her. I will stand confident knowing with God's timing all is perfect.

Expect a Miracle

There are days that I really want to get down and discouraged. My mind starts thinking and the devil gets a hold and doesn't let go. Even though God has spared me from death, even though He has blessed me beyond measure, I still want to throw the towel in at times.

Even though I believe in Him, even though my faith is strong. It's still very easy to think my mountains are much larger than any amount of faith that may be in me. You see, I am a thinker...and the devil knows I am. So that's where I fight most of my battles, in my mind. I wish I could be one of those carefree folks but I'm not. A planner, that's what I am. So when there is no plan, I feel like I'm out of control. But, that's exactly how God wants us. We are nothing, He is everything. Now that's hard to accept....but in our weakness, He is the strongest.

Expecting a miracle in any situation is hard because it requires us to see something that is not there as well as having no idea how it will ever happen. The other day I found the coolest sign. Expect a Miracle, kinda shabby chic, little pink dots on it....I bought it and it's now hanging in the pink bedroom. Do I feel crazy doing this? Yes. Do I kinda cringe when someone looks in there and see's my "acts of faith"? Yes. Are there days I want to take it down, paint the room and forget it all? Yes. Then in the stillness, in my time alone with God reading His Word, His voice is clear. He will give us the desires of our hearts, that he is longing to be good to us, that if we have faith as small as a mustard seed we can say mountain move and it will.

The coolest thing is we have the Word to get stirred up, to read about His wonderous works. To read how faith saw so many through. Abraham, Sarah, Moses, Noah, Rahab, Job, David....all of them, they all lived a miracle....some had heard about this man named Jesus but to have all the miracles in one book, they didn't have it....So here we are today roaming around. Trying to make things happen. Trying to come up with plans. Giving up on things that are in are heart. Forgetting that He is our Provider. Forgetting that He is the God that spoke the world into motion.

He wants to see our faith but without works it is nothing...I'm not talking about works, in the way many think...like working to get grace or mercy or any of the things He gives us for free....I'm talking about works of faith. Believing, speaking His Word, walking around that mountain, taking on the Goliath we may be facing. See it's easy to forget all the things He has done. It's hard when we face battle after battle. What if we didn't give up so easy, I wonder what would happen....maybe just exactly what we would least expect. A Miracle.

That horse....

A while back I wrote about this horse up from our house. While driving by this horse on several occasions, he was always in the same corner....After about 10 times noticing it, God spoke to me and said, "Paige you are much too like that horse." You get in your little safe corner and stay stuck there. There all too many of us that do the same thing.

Shortly thereafter, while driving one day I noticed the horse had moved from his little corner to out in the middle of the field. And, then another day he was over in another area. Very good, I thought...very, good. A lesson had actually been learned in it all and I tried myself to venture out and not stay in my little corner. Doing things that were bold and things that required more of me for others, rather than more of me for myself. Singing a little louder and speaking praises of our Lord a little more often. It was good, very good....

Now, a few days ago I drive by and THE HORSE IS BACK IN IT'S CORNER! How ironic .....exactly what we do.....It's so easy for us to get right back into the same ole, same ole. My corner is pretty safe....as little fear as possible, as little hurt, no worry about acceptance....So I go about not exposing myself to anymore than necessary and I pray that I can just stay in my little corner and have my relationship with God. I keep my back in the corner and I have visual of everything that comes my way, or at least I try my hardest. Control, I think that's what it's called.....

That personal relationship is important BUT what good are we doing if we aren't out sharing. Out in the middle of the field...just waiting for an opportunity to do what He has called us to do, be who we know He wants us to be. Not the "safe Christian" who makes it all personal but the "out in the field Christian" ready for whatever God needs us to do.

So it's crazy, this horse....It's like I know him....because he is just like me. I smile when I drive by now, whether he's out in the field or back in his corner. May we all be "out in the field Christians"!

Do you dance?

As I waited to board the plane on my way to Phoenix, I noticed a couple sitting across from me. The gentlemen was a tall, handsome gray headed man probably 50 or so and his wife, I assume, dressed in a cute pink top, a smile that radiated and a head with no hair. Cancer, I am sure.

I couldn’t help but wonder what type of cancer she had and if she was in remission or if she was fighting the disease. As I sat and waited to board, it was not hard to recognize the love the two had for each other. Sitting closely, holding hands, conversing back and forth, leaning their head on each other and even a kiss or two. Just in a few minutes, they probably shared more intimate moments than many of us do in a whole day, week or even possibly a lifetime!

My thoughts begin to wander with each look they gave each other, each kiss and each embrace. The good things at first like: were they going on a trip to see children, were they going on a vacation, maybe they had been to treatment and it was a great success and they were so happy with the outcome. Then the more somber thoughts like they only knew they had a little amount of time left together, possibly the cancer was incurable and they were enjoying the last few days, weeks or months they may have together.

So we boarded and I soon found my spot at the back of the plane. A bird’s eye view, maybe they wouldn’t notice me so entranced with the shear intimacy they were sharing. Both pointing and looking at the airplane window, he giving her soft pecks on the cheek, laughing with each other and putting his arm around her. She looking at him, like he was her knight in shining armor.
I am sure that they both have faced the reality of dealing with this deadly disease. The fear and angst that comes with any life and death diagnosis like cancer, can cause a person to really take a look at what is important in life. It really made me wonder why then is it so hard for us each day to not enjoy the same love they were experiencing. Like those songs go, “Live like you were dying,” or “If you get the chance to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance, I hope you dance.” Why is it so hard for us “to dance”? I can think of many times, I “sit it out” instead of “dancing”. Was it because of fear, anger, worry or complacency? Did we just not have the energy or the time? Were we so caught up in our life and what makes us happy, that we never took the time to be a blessing to others?

I don’t know how much time the lady in the pink shirt with the radiant smile might have to live. I’m not sure if her husband is just so joyful that he has more time with her or if he is spending the last few days he does have being the husband that maybe he hasn’t been for the last few years. Who knows? The time she has could be 10 years or it could be 10 days. Does it really matter? Should we be concerned how many days we have on this earth? God tells us that we have an eternal home. That this world is not our home. We are like pilgrims in a foreign land. God tells us that he formed us before we were in the womb and he knows each day that we will be presented. So why do we worry about tomorrow? Why don’t we live each day as the true gift it is, a gift from God. Is it possible that we could share more, give more and love more? Is it possible that we could “live like we were dying” or take that “dance” each day.

I’m thankful that God opened my eyes and my heart to the world around me. That he is showing me daily it so much more than me and more about Him. Thank you God for the lady in the pink shirt, radiant smile and bald head.

Choices

We are praying that God will lead us to the right option. Preferably, a bright neon sign saying "THIS IS IT"....I've found out about the Angel Adoption agency. It seems like it's a strong possibilty. It's a big committment though to begin the process. Almost 12,000....then about 7,000 more as the process continues. There is a 10,000 adoption credit in Arkansas. So ultimately the cost would be fairly resonable. So I'm not sure....we will just have to pray and I ask that if you would pray for us. God listens to His children.

Going to work on the final information for the Foster/Adopt program in a few weeks and hopefully we can complete the DHS'S home study. So lots to think about and pray about. Every day I'm feeling the strength of my God. We are blessed!

It's been over 3 months since I've posted. A lot has happened and I'll be the first to say that I've been discouraged even mad! But His mercies are new every morning- thank goodness. Though we doubt and get mad, He is there.

I've wondered why....I've cried and pleaded, I've screamed and yelled. I think He knows that I just need to release it all but my heart is what He knows. He searches our heart. So no matter what....my heart remains faithful to Him.

James talks some about perservering and endurance. Those words have kept resonating with me through all this. That we must know that He that began a good work in us will finish it. It seems as though we give up too soon. Job is read practicallly every day or two, as well. It's important that I keep reminding myself that no matter how bad it may seem. God is in control.

We question at times why things happen. We wonder if it's punishment or if we've done something wrong. What seems to be coming clearer and clearer to me is that sometimes He allows it to happen to bring us into obedience. Even testing our heart.....are we faithful just when it's all "roses" or do we stay strong in heart and mind when we are faced wtih trials and tribulations. How many times have you gave up? It probably take my fingers and toes to count all the times I have, I may even have to borrow a few others.....

We can't give up. No matter what religion you are, no matter what doors you enter to worship....the bottom line is- We are to be a light in the world. When folks are looking to see how we handle situations- do they see and hear fear and doubt or are do we praise and remain faithful? It doesn't say anywhere in the Bible that it's easy. Matter a fact, I believe it states we will have trials and tribulations, that we will be faced to endure, that we may even wander a few years out in the wilderness. But PRAISE GOD that we can know that GOD IS IN CONTROL!

Almost Home

Well we are counting down the days....that's right....no more months! We are so excited about getting in our new home. It's been almost 3 years that we've waited to build since we sold our last house. We are so blessed to be able to build this house and are very happy to know that we have made decisions and looked to God to direct our path on it. It's the first house we've done that way, this makes our third...having faith and looking to God, sure beats the other chaos!

So the next step with the adoption is having them come do the final home study once we are in and settled. Hopefully, that will happen maybe in May or June. It was 1 yr. ago in April that we officially began this journey. Boy, it's been a journey and we've not even made it to the fun part yet! But, God has worked so deeply in the whole process, we have learned and grown so much in our faith. So, there is not one regret at all. There's not one bit of anxious feelings because we know God is in control.

In reality....it looks a little dim. The whole adoption thing. My health is such a big question right now. The doctors say this and that....and we listen. We thank them for their ability and knowledge. But then we have to turn it over to God. We can't dwell on any of it. It's a little more real, yes, wearing the external difibulator, kinda hit home...that goodness, I really might need this becaues of what's going on. So, it's hard to deny it because it's right there. But, then I thank God for what he's doing and what he is doing in our lives. And, what He is going to do. I speak those words of faith. He says that the word is as sharp as any double edge sword! Now that is some powerful stuff. So daily I get worded up. Constantly, reciting verses or singing words to songs in my head. Most of the time out loud, boy I've had some funny looks in Wal Mart....because the Holy Spirit will just come over me. I'm thankful for His Word.

I think about being almost home, what that means....here on earth, we look to the 4 walls and the place we can rest and feel safe. I can't help but think of our heavenly home. All the loved ones that have gone on before. The beautiful songs that will be sung as we enter in....it will be beautiful and I can't wait to see His face. Won't it be wonderful there, having no burdens to bear, joyfully singing with heart bells all ringing, oh won't it be wonderful there. An old hymn that we sing. It will be wonderul, won't it!

Love

Just some thoughts on Cor. 13

Though I share with others the love of God and speak in tongues by the Holy Spirit but have not LOVE, not one person will believe me and know the true LOVE of God.

Though I understand and discern His word and have faith that can move mountains, but have not LOVE, I am nothing!

Though I help those less fortunate and give my time to good works, but have not LOVE, I have nothing.

LOVE suffers long,
LOVE is kind,
LOVE does not envy,
LOVE does not boast,
LOVE does not behave rudely,
LOVE does not keep a record of wrong doings,
LOVE bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

LOVE NEVER FAILS.

Try putting your name in where LOVE is....Then step back and see if the statements are true.....

For a long time I've held on to anger and bitterness. I've had my little notepad in my head of the wrongs me/my family have suffered. And, it's been some suffering. Haven't we all suffered at the hands of fellow Christians, loved ones and friends. Haven't we each caused pain in anothers life? But, I think of our suffering and our sin. I think of His suffering and I realize that though my heart hurts and we've cried a thousand tears....God is Love. He forgives.

There is no place in the heart that LOVES God and receives His LOVE for anything but what Cor. 13 states. So then what....You forgive as He has forgiven. You LOVE as He has LOVED. Is it easy? No. Is this a commandment? Yes. Do we need to show obedience? Yes.

LOVE. This is My commandment, that YOU LOVE ONE ANOTHER as I HAVE LOVED YOU. They will know you are my disciples if YOU LOVE ONE ANOTHER.

So, I'll take a step forward today and I'll try and really grasp His amazing LOVE a little deeper and work on LOVING no matter what. Because really what are we all searching for? Acceptance, Love...feeling like we are cared for and if WE as Christians can't be that, NO MATTER WHAT, for this crazy world we live in...HOW WILL "THEY" EVER KNOW HIM?

Choices

So when you get some bad news or things don't go exactly like you planned, what do you do? Do you get upset and anxious? Or do you realize that God is in control? He knows it all. Do you realize that in this world we will have trials and tribulations? That it depends on our personal choice as to how we react to these trials.

He never leaves us or forsakes us. He is there as we walk through our valleys or experience our pain. Our choice is to look to him. Do not be discourage or dismayed for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. If it's on the mountaintop or down in the valley, He is right there.

We have a choice. We can give up, we can be discouraged, we can think that this is how it is....OR We can stand strong on the Rock, we can Praise Him during the storm, We can be still and know He alone is God.

Thankful

I am so thankful for my Father's love. I'm so thankful that He was willing to give His Son so that I can have everlasting life! I'm so thankful that He loves even a sinner such as I. I think about all the times I've failed Him, denied Him, questioned Him and through it all- HE REMAINS THE SAME.

If he can lift me up out of the miry clay and turn beauty from my ashes. He can deliver us from anything! What makes you think He can save us from our sins, provide us eternal life...but not heal us, not give us the overflowing, abundant life He has promised us. I will never leave you or forsake you. Even though you walk through the valley, I AM with you. He rewards those that dilegently seek Him. Not just wish for the best, hope for the best, oh...still bad news, oh still this or that...and then give up. We must dilegently look for Him, believe in Him, perservere, endure....all those things that are hard. Why? Because we are a people of convenience. A people that want, what we want, RIGHT NOW!!! Wouldn't it be amazing if we could realize that He knows our every step, NOTHING surprises Him! No loss of job, no illness, no financial problem or marital issue...BUT He does want us to look to Him for the answer and the call to obedience. That's the hard part!

My prayer Father is that we all strive and endure and perserver and know YOU ALONE ARE GOD!!!

Questioning God.....

Have you ever had the rug pulled completely out from under you? Have you ever just been trotting right a long and then the horse bucks you completely off? Have you ever felt like you are so close to having your life just going completely like you dreamed and then boom, it all comes to a screeching halt?

I guess we all have had things happen that have made us question God. Wonder why is this happening. It's like it's been tough...and then we found You. We've believed in You and then how come? Why is this happening now? Our dreams are so close. We have the faith. We've seen it through Your eyes. This one thing could change it all.

So I cry and I cry and I'm scared and I want to scream. But deep down I feel You say, "I am here, Paige." So I trust, we have to trust....that You are Sovereign. That He that has begun a work will finish it. That somehow, even how scary and uncertain it may seem...somehow...we still have to have faith. That faith isn't built during all the good times, but in the fiery furnace and in the belly of the whale and when we face Goliath. That in this world we will have trials and tribulations but take joy in knowing HE HAS OVERCOME THE WORLD! PRAISE GOD, for Greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world.

So I will stand firm on my Rock, I will not be moved. I will say, "Devil, you are a liar!"- you have come to steal, kill and destroy but MY GOD has said I have come to give you Life and a Life more abundant. So no disease, no sickness, not one thing can come against my Rock and the fountain in which I drink of, My God is the My Rock and My salvation- NOTHING SHALL I FEAR!

So no matter what. I will keep walking in faith. I may feel like my brothers have sold me in to slavery, I may feel like there isn't one friend I can lean on, I may feel like our dreams are shattered. BUT I KNOW A GOD who turns water in to wine. Who can cause the Red Sea to stand up and part. Who can cause the blind to see and the lame to walk. I have a God that Healeth Thee! So instead of fear and loneliness. I choose PEACE and JOY and LOVE and LONGSUFFERING and PATIENCE....My God will supply everything I need.

Is there anything too big for God?

Do you believe that God cares enough to take care of all of your needs? Don't you know the desires He has placed on your heart, he is ready to have come to pass. He wants to give us the desires of our heart! We must do one thing and that's believe and praise Him. Not just praise Him once it happens but praise Him before you see anything! Praise precedes the victory!

Is there something that you've been believing for? Did God place something on your heart that you tell yourself there's no way? Do you have a desire or dream that died years ago and you think well it's too late? Stand up today and know there is nothing too big for God! Don't think about what didn't happen, or what you didn't do. Look to Him and he will give you new dreams or renew the dream that died. Speak words of faith and know that with God all things are possible!

Acting in Faith

Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen. One of my favorite verses. I'll have to just say "it is written" cause I can never remember book, chapter and verse....

Today we went and picked out colors for the house. Of course, her room is pink. Not a bright pink or rosy pink, just a soft pink. Preparing, believing, seeing in our spiritual eyes that's what we have to do. In the natural it may seem like nothing is there but we serve a God who provides! Last night I lay in bed thinking about her. I do that quite often. Wondering when she'll be here, how it will happen, all that....it's not like the typical "pregnancy wait" knowing you will deliver in 9 months, go to hospital, all that....This is like up in the air, completely running on faith. You know what though? It's all good because I know God is in control. It's really helped us in our walk with Him. Putting all our trust in Him in all we do. It's hard and we are learning every day but I'm so glad we are learning and not stuck where we were.

Patience, I think that's probably the biggest thing. You can be joyful, loving, even peaceful pretty easy....but boy that patience thing, that's a doosey for us! So it may not be tomorrow, it may not be next month....but we know His plan is in motion. That's the most reassuring thing we could ever know. Trust in the Lord your God with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding, but in all ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path! Can't get any better than that!

Are you stuck in the same corner?

It's been a while since I've wrote, so much going on in the Evans household....House building, new job for me, Clinton back home, ice storm, taxes (yuck!)....Lots of stuff! We are getting closer to completion on the house. I can't wait to get in and get the final home study done, so we can go to the next step with the adoption. Keep praying for us. We are growing weary and discouraged. We know we want God's timing....so we have to remain patient. Pray that we don't loose sight of Him.

The other day I was driving by a house just down the road from our new home. I've noticed this horse the last few times....It seems like every time I drive by, he's standing in the same corner! Now I don't know much about horses, and maybe this is a common thing for them. But, I did realize something the other day. How many times do I go to the same corner? We are such creatures of habit, well at least I am....How about you? Do you find yourself sitting on the same pew at the same spot? Do you go and eat at the same restaurant every time you go out? Do you talk to the same people at the ball game? Do you listen to the same music, watch the same tv show? Attend the same "church" for the last 20 years? Now I may get some eyebrows raised at that one! But really, have you ever thought that stepping outside your box, your little world that you just might see Jesus in a different light....Have you ever thought that God might have something out there for you but you have to be willing to change it up. That poor horse has been standing in that corner for how long??!!! He's missed so much by standing in the corner. I've never seen him running around or for that fact just standing in a different corner. What have we missed out on by playing it safe and staying in our corner?

God desires for us to have an abundant, over flowing, full life. He tells us the world is ours! How cool is that! So next time you start walking over to that corner. Think about the the fullness of our God and the fullness of our world and the "people" that we miss every day, because we are in "our corner".

Praying and then waiting....

How many times have you caught yourself praying about something and then 2 or 3 days later, goodness for me sometimes withing the next hour...TAKE IT ALL BACK OVER!!!! Please,don't tell me I'm the only one!!! Well, some of you may know about our situation. Clinton went back to the State Police back in April. He had to move to Searcy Co. though till an opening came available here in Marion Co. Yes, move there. So he loaded up a travel trailer, much thanks to a fellow trooper for allowing us to use it, and headed to Searcy Co. to live 5 days a week. Needless to say, the prayers began before he got out the door. We prayed that those in authority would recognize the need for Clinton to be with his family. God created families to be together. We knew Clinton returning to the ASP was what God intended because of the way it all happened. So we knew we were in His will but just trying to figure out why Clinton had to leave.

I don't wonder that anymore. More on that later.....

Anyway, prayers went up daily, many times a day.....At night the boys and I would cry as we tried to get the words out to God. That was hard. But we refused to get downcast or discouraged. We refused to take it over and try and figure out how WE could get him back here. Who WE needed to talk to or butter up...So WE just decided to let go and let GOD! In the meantime,we all received a little bit more patience and longsuffering as we chose to praise God for all He has done for us and that He wouldn't leave us now. Nor, leave Clinton down in Searcy Co. forever!!!

Dec. 22nd we received a letter, an unexpected letter! The best Christmas present we have ever recieved. I'll share with you the most important part of the letter, "My request is that Corporal Evans be returned to Marion Co. as soon as possible." That's right, not just return him but AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!!! As I read the letter, I knew that God had taken care of us. Doesn't He always, IF WE LET HIM! Our prayer had been answered. It wasn't the next day, it wasn't the next week, it wasn't even the next month. It was 9 months later. Like I said, we learned to develop patience and being a little more longsuffering. We experienced feelings of loss and despair at times but in the end we always praised Him. That's what He desires from us to look to Him in all we do and He will direct our path. In the real world, to the flesh, it looked as though Clinton would be there for a while. No troop school in site, no word from anyone, nothing....but we knew in our world the one God heads up, that He had it under control.